I am a frequent visitor to Europe. This included a one-year expat assignment in England from March 2000 to March 2001. Once I arrived in the U.K., I started receiving piles of "How's it going?" e-mails. Since I didn't intend to spend my year in Europe sitting at home with a keyboard on my lap, I figured I'd put up a little diary. So, here is one year of my life. Enjoy.

Day 1 - Thursday, March 2
I've been on just about all the major jetliners. This was my first time on a 777. Business Class alone had more seats than your average domestic jetliner. I sat next to an engine larger than my bedroom, and for some time marveled in what it took to create it. Moments like that make me glad I was born as a human and not a rat or gnat.
AA 777

England greeted me with rain, but I didn't see it as a bother. As I waited around for a coach to Swindon, I felt tired, and didn't quite feel like I was anything but a tourist at the moment.

I finally arrived at work shortly before 11am. Everyone was offering me a coffee everywhere I went. 4 hours in, and there was no lack of hospitality. Met all the members of my new group, and settled in to the mission critical task of the day: driving home.

It's a good thing I work in a office park, since I had to drive my VW Golf around for about an hour just to get 1st and 3rd gears sorted out. No, I'm not good at driving a stick. I managed to stall the car about 20 times trying for 1st and hitting 3rd instead. Then came the part that made my heart pound: the roundabouts. I've been told that Swindon has an abnormally large number of roundabouts... including "The Magic Roundabout", which consists of five smaller roundabouts packed into a larger one. Thankfully I don't have to visit that one on my way home.

I managed to get home stalling only once at the top of a hill, and contemplated kissing the ground when I got out, but opted to fall into my flat and sleep well.
Dixon Street, Swindon

Day 2 - Friday, March 3
First proper day of work. The full English breakfast at 10am (a ritual on Fridays) did a lot to slow me down, and drinking at the pub at 1 did a little more to that effect. I'm not sure anything was accomplished apart from sorting through a huge amount of e-mail which had built up over only two days.

Day 3 - Saturday, March 4
Wandered around the town centre of Swindon for a bit in the morning. The place isn't as bad as I had envisioned. Then came the first surreal bit. I look up, and see the Concorde cruising by on approach to Heathrow. I stood there and watched it, and that was the first moment I felt I was suddenly in a foreign land.

I'd been itching to take a train for a while now, so I went into Bath, which is a 25 minute ride from Swindon. This was the first time I had really seen the countryside, and I must say it had an effect. After we passed the trailer parks on the outskirts of Swindon, it was only beauty. Square American farmland keeps my attention for about a minute. From one square plot to the next: dull. The English country is constantly changing. From cottages to fantastic churches, there is always something there to keep your attention.

I wandered up and down the hills of Bath until my back began to hurt (again). Passed a bakery with a sign out front that read "Try our Faggots!". Might need that phase book after all, since I've found "spotted dick" for sale here and there as well.

Day 4 - Sunday, March 5
Everything's quite closed.. Going to have to get used to this. Walked around Old Town, discovered the gorgeous bike path that led from Old Town almost directly to my office. Must buy a bike soon.

Day 5 - Monday, March 6
I figured I'd have the roundabouts down by now. Unfortunately, I seem to get pulled in to the wrong lane every time. Consequently, I am in the wrong exit lane, and always seem to find myself going down a road I don't want to be on. Getting to work took about three times as long as a result.

Spent much of today figuring out the lab here in Swindon. Naturally, they do everything differently.

Day 6 - Tuesday, March 7
Got a tour of the huge new factory today.. Amazing place. Saw machines which submit our radios to 16-G force pressures.. and incredible temperatures... heard one story of the radio working right up the point where the solder melted off the board and the chips slipped off.

In case you're wondering, I've got a 2-bedroom flat and I'm sleeping on the floor again.

Day 7 - Wednesday, March 8
Ah, Britain. I get home, discover I have no food, walk to the local supermarket and discover it closed at 6pm. Naturally the only places open are pubs, McDonalds, and Burger King. One Answer: Guiness is Food.

Managed to get to and from work today without getting honked at. Still got off the roundabouts at the wrong exits though.

Let me take a moment to express my disgust for the American electoral process. Look at our choice for president: 1) An out-of-touch millionaire raised to be a politician by his politician father. OR 2) An out-of-touch millionaire raised to be a politician by his politician father. Brilliant. Why bother even voting?

Day 9 - Friday, March 10
Woah.. first day of stress. Stress for is running in the lab, making loud noises, taking antacid. I think I'm starting to scare some of my lower-key co-workers, but I hope they know it's all in the name of productivity.

Finally got my mobile phone account. Managed to get the pin wrong three times, locking the phone from my control. Figures. What a way to end the week.

Day 10 - Saturday, March 11
Went to London today for lack of anything better to do. Wandered aimlessly for hours. In the two years it has been since I've been to London something horrible has happened: there is now a Starbucks on every corner. I can't recall having seen a single once back in '98. I also "discovered" a Rainforest Cafe... dreadful.

So I'm on a train from London back to Swindon, there are no chairs, and I'm sitting next to a door reading the paper. I'm flipping through the upcoming gigs, and I nearly shit a brick when I saw that in two days, the Wannadies are playing in Bristol. Where the hell have I been? They have a new album out, which I plan on buying promptly tomorrow. And Tuesday, I get to see one of my five favorite bands for the very first time. I'm quite happy I must say.

At this point I'd have to say I'm getting a bit lonely. This was the first Saturday night I've been here without being completely jetlagged. I still don't know anyone outside of work, and it showed tonight, as I sat at home with a tube of Pringles, a Caffreys, and Simpsons video I bought at Virgin.

Day 11 - Sunday, March 12
Gorgeous weather! I'm talking about 60 and not a cloud in the sky. I was brave, and drove around the town for a while. Later, I found the health club, surrendered about $200 in the name if health, and had my first workout in about a month.

Day 12 - Monday, March 13
Found out the Wannadies show in Bristol is sold out. I'm totally crushed. Luckily, there is *one more* more that is not sold out. It's in Nottingham in May; so it looks like I'll be making a bit of a roadtrip.

Day 14 - Wednesday, March 15
God, this year is going fast already.

Day 16 - Friday, March 17
Caught a throat infection on the flight back to Chicago. Ouch.

Day 17 - Saturday, March 18
Back in Chicago for the weekend. Got my hair colored blue and stayed out until 10am U.K. time.

Day 18 - Sunday, March 19
Moved more stuff from my Chicago apartment into storage.

Got a flat tire on the rental on the Kennedy.. couldn't find the key for the spare.. Budget couldn't get a tow truck to me for two hours, so I took a cab to the airport to get another car. Very annoying evening.

Day 19 - Monday, March 20
Working at the Arlington Office. Flew back to London in the evening. Hard time getting a bottle of gin home. First, I buy a bottle in Chicago and leave it at a friend's house accidentally. Then I buy a duty-free bottle in Chicago, and manage to drop it in Heathrow, making baggage reclaim #5 smell a bit alcoholic.

Day 22 - Thursday, March 23
Went out with a few co-workers on their Thursday night drinking binge. Tackled a gin and tonic and 4 imperial pints of sooty brew. Not a very restful sleep that night.

Day 23 - Friday, March 24
Did roughly the same thing again, only danced the alcohol off, and kept enough water in me to allow me to wake up sane the next morning.

Day 24 - Saturday, March 25
A good laugh. It was easy enough: Get from Swindon to Folkstone to attend Liam and Owen's housewarming party. Simple enough. Unfortunately, Curtis does something really dumb. This will be my first time on the motorways, so I'm quite thrilled with the idea of bolting across the countryside at 85 mph. As a side note: this VW Golf is a dream, and I'm completely sold on the VW brand whenever I end up buying another car.
My '97 VW Golf

Anyway, while trying to concentrate on the road, I managed to stop concentrating on the road signs. Little did I know I clipped right by the exit for the M25, and managed to do something I swore I would never do: find myself driving through Central London. Once the M4 became the A4 I figured I'd better stick with it, since turning around would probably only add to the confusion. I fixed my sights on navigating Southeast (without a map), and found myself passing Harrods, driving through Picadilly Circus, eventually through New Cross and Lewisham and onto the A20, which became the M20. I'm quite amazed that I 1) survived driving Central London, and 2) actually found the M20 without a map. It added about 2 hours to my trip time, but I ended up being rather amused by the whole episode, as opposed to angry or scared beyond belief.

Spent the evening in Folkstone with old and new friends.

Day 25 - Sunday, March 26
Took a walk around Folkstone. After some initial rain, a bright Sun lit the day, bringing the town out to walk along a very scenic coastal walk. The French coastline was very easily seen across the Channel.
The Channel and, eventually, France

Made it home in a little over 2 hours, as opposed to 4.5 the day before.

Day 27 - Tuesday, March 28
Moved to my permanent home today. Pleased to find that it is much larger than my previous flat, with more anemities than I had ever had in Chicago. In the downside, the interior is downright hideous: red furniture (some plaid, some solid), green carpet and light green walls. The bathroom is the most pleasant room in the house, which doesn't make a whole lot of sense, since I spent the least time there.
Living Room, View 1
Living Room, View 2

All my belongings from the U.S. were delivered less than an hour after I moved in. I soon realised I had brought far too much stuff with me. With little space to store anything, my bedroom will remain spotted with boxes for the whole year.

Suprisingly, I tried sleeping in the bed at this place, and found it wonderful. It's like sleeping on a wood plank.. just the way I like it.

Day 31 - Saturday, April 1
Did a tour of Somerset with a friend of mine. Through Bath into Cheddar Gorge: England's version of the Grand Canyon. Past Cheddar with it's awful gift shops full of cheese. On to Wells, with spring water flowing down the main street in the town. The Wells Cathedral was fantastic, as well as the street market in which I bought nearly $10 of olives and ate them all in 2 days.

The drive back was amazing... narrow roads, spectacular scenery. Some rather touristy spots.. but at was it wasn't a mod scene, like it will be come summertime.

Drove to Bristol in the evening where I circled the City Centre about 10 times in the ran, trying to find the pub I was going to without having an accident on the way. I barely made it. Had a great time in a few Bristol clubs that night.

Day 32 - Sunday, 2 April
After waking up slightly past Noon, I spent the day unpacking the remainder of my belingings... eating about 100 olives in the process. That evening I drove up to Warwick to meet up with a friend for the evening. One the way back, I hydroplaned through a rainstorm most of the way, taking plenty of wrong turns and arriving home about an hour later than I should have. This time, I wasn't too amused.

Day 35 - Wednesday, April 5
Well, the music scene is pretty nonexistant in Swindon, but I’ve managed to plan a few roadtrips elsewhere. Next week, I’m travelling to Dudley to catch Miles Hunt at JBs. This should be interesting, as JBs is the very first club The Wonder Stuff ever performed at over 15 years ago. After that, comes two concerts by The Wannadies, in Oxford and Coventry. I’m completely addicted to their new album, "Yeah". Listening to it right now actually. It has had stellar reviews, yet noone buy its. Why? Cause people here are bred to think that stuff like Mel C. and the Backstreet Boys is best entertainment has to offer. Right.

Day 37 - Friday, April 7
Ok, now I’m trapped, so I must write. I’m 2601 miles from Chicago, 36000 feet, 583 mph, -70F outside, or so the screen in front of me says. I’m returning for a weekend in Chicago, and this time I’m brought along my laptop. Prepare for a ramble.

I remember at Purdue a vague psychology lesson on phases of adjustment. With respect to moving it went something like: elation, depression, adjustment. I may have missed a phase, but I know well enough to know that I’m in the depression phase. When I first got here, I was in love with everything. "Swindon isn’t so bad, I’d say to my horrified co-workers." Now I know better: Swindon is a shithole. As I stood waiting for a bus this afternoon, I read copy of our weak newspaper. It included an editorial by someone on the Swindon Town Council, outlining why Swindon was such a great place to live. Things like the Railway Museum (currently closed) were supposed to make us thankful we didn’t live somewhere without a Railway Museum, like London.

Yet I think I’ll be happy here.. I’m good at making friends, so the day to day life shouldn’t be a problem. It’s the permanence that brought me down. I’m here for one year. Since I tend to imagine relationships as long-term events, it goes without saying that I either become a slut or accept that I’m here to work and travel, but not to fall in love and live happily ever after. Mind you, I did leave Chicago for lack of anything keeping me there, but removing the possibility of finding someone does dampen the mood. I’m not keen on starting anything long-distance.. Stockholm did enough to break that mindset.

So, the time is right for a trip home. My friend Chris is escaping his real life in the cast of a play this weekend, and I’m looking forward seeing him sing.. (How many of YOUR co-workers have you seen sing?) I’m also planning on a good bit of shipping. Things like Ziploc bags and Power Bars haven’t made it across the pond yet, and I refuse to adapt to not having them. I’m also looking forward to a night out on the town… excuse me, city. There is a difference.

The day ended with over an hour of flying circles over Grand Rapids, Michigan. The unusual April snowstorm in Chicago managed to get me to bed a little after 2:30am, which didn’t leave me in the best of moods.

Day 38 - Saturday, April 8
Having spent over a month spending pounds, the urge to spend is irresisable back in Chicago. Everything is so cheap in comparison. As a result, I over spend. In 20 minutes on Michigan Avenue I managed to spend as much as the cost of the ticket to bring me here. I can somehow justify this.. since I am living in Swindon after all.

Day 39 - Sunday, April 9
The highlight of the day was watching my friend Chris hop around a huge stage in the St. James production of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. God I hate musicals. It was fun though, despite the suburban big hair in front of me, blocking most of my view. The choir of about 70 5-10 year olds was heartwarming, but I can’t help think what an annoying ass Andrew Lloyd Weber must be.

Finished the day attempting to get some work done. Never happens.

Day 40 - Monday, April 10
Worked in Chicago, flew home in the evening. Realise I left my Visa card somewhere on the other side.

Day 42 - Wednesday, April 12
Drove up to Dudley, just outside of Birmingham to see a Miles Hunt show. JB's was where the Wonder Stuff first performed, in a different location though. Great show, much more energy than in the American audiences.. But then, the British do seem to hop around and make noise a bit more than Americans.

Probably had about 7-9 drinks that night.. Discoverd the magic of Red Bull.. which left me feeling a little dry in the morning, but no hangover.

Day 43 - Thursday, April 13
The hotel decided to omit my wake-up call, so I found myself heading back later than I had planned. Once in the Cotswolds, I managed to do what I always seem to do in the Cotswolds: get lost. I managed to get to work a little after Noon, and as usual, noone noticed.

Day 46 - Sunday, April 16
Got out on my skates for the first time since moving to Swindon. I'm pleased to say that there are plenty of decent places to skate in Swindon. Unfortunately, in 3 hours on skates I only encountered one other skater: a 10 year old who wanted to know what tricks I could do (none). Not much compared to Chicago's lakefront parks.
Old Town Swindon

Day 51 - Friday, April 21
Time for the first proper trip to the mainland... Zurich! My friends Chris and Tami from Chicago were already there, and I decided to join the weekend of fun.

I hadn't done any homework at all on this one: I didn't know where Zurich was on the Swiss map, nor did I know much about the country at all. I musn't do that again, since I knew I had made my first mistake before the plane had even landed. As we glided in on approach, I watched a beautiful country pass by. Then it got worse. In countless trails dotting the landscape there were literally hundreds of people on skates enjoying a stunning day. I instantly craved to be amongst them.

Shortly before I moved to England, I heard an interesting statstic: The British government spends $0.70 per year per person per year on public transit. Pretty low. Switzerland spends $7 per person per year. As soon as I stepped on the train at the airport I was in love. I've always enjoyed public transit: it's one of the requirements of my life. Even in Chicago I take public transit whenever I can: despite the smells, sights, and noises I could do without. The train to Zurich was huge, spotless, new, and felt like it was gliding on air. As expected, it left and arrived precisely when it was scheduled to. I must also say that every other train I was to take during my trip fit the same description.

Within an hour of landing in Zurich I was in a paddleboat with Chris and Tami on Lake Zurich. I had some from 45 degress and wet to 75 degress and sunny, with snowcapped mountains in the distance. It was stunning. That night, I put roughly 20 pounds of fondue cheese in my belly, and survived.
Chris and Tami

Day 52 - Saturday, April 22
Took a train up to the Rheinfalls, near Schaffhausen. I've never been to Niagra Falls, so this one impressed the hell out of me. I stood over a flow of water that would blow a small town to kindling in seconds: it was quite a sight.
The Rheinfalls

Day 53 - Sunday, April 23
A three hour train ride took us within a Mile of the Italian border, to the town of Lugano. A pizza in an outdoor cafe and a boatride around the lake made for an awfully relaxing day. The boat made it to the Italian border, so technically, I made it to Italy.
Lugano, Switzerland
Chris, sleeping
Feeding the Swiss birds

The evening was another boozy event. The odd moment of the evening must have been the cab ride home: the driver was this queer Prince wannabe. The car was all decked out in stuffed animals and feathery things. I didn't know whether to be scared or amused.

Day 54 - Monday, April 24
It was the day after Easter, and as there was nothing open, I wandered around the city for few hours. The McDonald's was a bit infuriating. I didn't opt to try the 'McSheriff' burger.
The Zurich Trams
McBarf

At the end of the day I was back on a plane to London, where the rain was waiting for me.

Day 56 - Wednesday, April 26
Got my tickets for next week's Wannadies show in the mail today. I just have to remark how incredibly excited I am to be going to this show. I have a history of loving bands which expire or live too far away, so I never see them. The Wannadies have been at the top of my favorites list for about two years now, it's about time I saw them!

Day 58 - Friday, April 28
On a train to London at 5pm. This was second of three, 4-day weeks. I love the botched British holiday schedule. It was the 3rd wettest April on record, and it's pissing down as usual. I was wearing thin tan pants which I'd just discovered you can basically see through when wet.

Had a very wonderful evening in London, ending about 3am. At 1 hour by train from Swindon, it is definitly something I have to do more often.

Day 59 - Saturday, April 29
This might sound odd, but I really do love the British weather. Simply stated, you cherish the good days when the days are mainly bad. Growing up in Florida it was sunny and warm all the time. It meant nothing. It was boring. Here, it pisses down most of the time, but when the good weather comes around, the feeling is stunning.

Staying in London with my friend Richard, I open up the drapes in the morning to find a perfectly blue sky, warm air, and BA 747s rolling by. It was stunning. Mind you, we've had fine days, but this was Saturday, and I was in London.

We spent the day shopping, and I must say I've finally found the stores to keep me pacified. Previously, I needed to get back to Chicago to shop, but I've now been shown the path here. And it's a damn expensive one!

Finished the bit in London with something I'd been dreaming of doing for years: inline skating around Hyde Park. It could not have been more perfect.

Back in Swindon, I made myself very drunk, for that is what we do here.

Day 60 - Sunday, April 30
Another beautiful day. Unfortunately, I didn't want the sun quite as bright. I've also learned something about God. He makes it rain here for a reason: to wash the puke off the streets. In American, we puke in toilets, therefore, the streets are clean. In England, people puke on sidewalks. Despite the nice weather today, I'd rather have the hurl washed off my sidewalk.

On a frustrating note, The Wannadies just cancelled their Coventry and Oxford shows, leaving back at Square One.

Day 64 - Thursday, May 4
Having a week of hell at work. Big deadlines approach. Working late and wondering if I'm being too American. My office is deserted at 6pm: I was there until 9 tonight. That's not a rare thing back in the States, but it apparently is here. I must say that a strict 8 hour day and 5 weeks of vacation is quite attractive.

Day 66 - Saturday, May 6
Went to IKEA in Bristol to find some bed linen. I refuse to sleep with the pink sheets they gave me any longer. Unfortunately, like the mega-IKEA in Chicago, the one in Bristol was full of junk, and out of the few things I wanted. I walked out with some candles and a belly full of meatballs and ended up at a mall in Swindon to buy sheets.

Went to work after that, on a muggy day I would call 'hot'. The place was deserted, which meant one thing, that I would actually get some work done. I did.

Day 67 - Sunday, May 7
I'm starting a do a ritual pub lunch on Sunday afternoons. For some reason, the past two weekends have had the most perfect weather: low 70's and sunny. Anyway, today's pub was the first traditional lunch I'd had in a while: roast beef, carrots, cabbage, and bread pudding. Would have tasted like crap if it weren't for the delicious warm beer.

Day 68 - Monday, May 8
I might be all sarcasm and cute moments up to now, but I really am enjoying it here. Here's another reason why. I took a walk after dinner tonight. Within 5 minutes of my flat, I found a footpath into a wooded area I didn't even know existed. Past mounds of horse poop and fox holes, I found an underbrush full of millions of purple flowers. They glowed in the dusk, and really made the day, perhaps the week.

Day 72 - Friday, May 12
Outside my apartment I have discovered a sight I thought I would never see. There, in the trees, is a pidgeon, in a NEST. By nest, I don't mean a pile of poop on a steel girder under an El platform or a potted plant, but a genuine twig and feather nest. Had no idea they even knew how to do that.

Day 73 - Saturday, May 13
Took a train into Bristol mid-morning. There I discovered the one thing that might allow me to keep my sanity while I'm here: sushi. It was incredibly expensive, and wasn't even very good, but it was raw fish, and I needed it. I might go back next Saturday.

In the afternoon and into the evening I found myself at a poker party, where I lost £50, followed by another party where I lost the rest of my sobriety, followed by a club where I.....

Day 75 - Monday, May 15
Well, tonight was supposed to be the big Wannadies concert in London. I finally found out why the tour was cancelled: some sort of dispute with their record company. Sigh. Anyway, I still had a rail ticket to London, so I went in and had a few drinks with my friend Richard. Wandered around a bit before heading back: buzzing and beautiful even on a Monday night.

Day 76 - Tuesday, May 16
I had a really really bad day at work today. Everything I touch in the lab seems to break. I haven't gotten anything done in days, and I could feel my teeth clenching all day long. I had to take a long walk just to chill. The problem is this: in Chicago it takes me 10 minutes to do X task. In Swindon, it takes an hour. I'm here to fix that, but it's a bit of a frustrating challenge.

Day 80 - Saturday, May 20
Back in London, since I NEED London. I find myself thinking about Chicago more and more recently. As if this is some sort of delayed homesickness that might get worse and worse and worse.

Luckily, the weekend kept my mind off of it, as I saw my first London theatre in 5 years, a play called "An Inspector Calls". Excellent, if not different.

Day 82 - Monday, May 22
Drove about 90 minutes Northeast to a town called Wavendon to see a Miles Hunt gig at a beautiful new auditorium hidden in a rural forest. Very nice gig, and an even better drive around the English country: something I have to start doing more often.

I've finally converted pence/litres to dollars/gallons for all you the Americans complaining about gas prices. I paid $5.96/ gallon to fill up my car at Sainsburys last night. So for all the Ameircans moaning about $2.00/ gallon being unfair, unbearable, etc., I have only one thing to say: bite me.

Day 87 - Saturday, May 27
Another 3 day weekend, and I'm sitting in the living room, completely unmotivated. All I can think of to do today is buy pillows, which should take me all of 10 minutes at our annoying outlet mall. However, considering it is grey and hailing outside, I'm quite content to just sit here in my underwear, listen to music, and watch my computer crash over and over.

The computer crashing starting about 2 weeks ago. Not sure what is going on, but I'm beginning to suspect the memory is failing. I had originally suspected the video card, since the screen froze, but the mouse remained operative. However, the MP3s stop during some crashes, and not others, so it's got to be something closer to the memory right? I've started bringing my laptop home again, since I just can't be bothered to figure out what's going on. Save often.

The week just passed was mildly annoying, as Friday was a deadline at work. I worked more than I wanted, with constant questions coming from both sides of the Atlantic. True to form, every line of code I touched, broke. When I need to be getting things done at work, the gnomes come out to stop me.

Day 92 - Thursday, June 1
Off to London after work to see "Big Yoga Muffin" play. This is Ange Doolittle's new band. After having previously fronted Eat and WeKnowWhereYouLive, this is the first time I've seen him live. Apart from thinking how much I'd like his hair, the show was fantastic, and I'm definitly going to be on the lookout for their new single.

Day 94 - Saturday, June 3
Got a tour of Windsor. Rather, I got a tour of the American tourists touring Windsor.

Day 95 - Sunday, June 4
Went into Wooten Basset to find another traditional Sunday dinner at a pub. Returned to my home and installed Linux Mandrake 7.0. Windows 98 has pissed me off for the last time, so I'm giving Linux another shot. It was a rather geeky day.

Day 101 - Saturday, June 10
I've been given a good opportunity to catch up on this diary thingy considering I've got a raging British headcold and my weekend have been reduced to tissue and snot. So here I sit in my living room on a Saturday morning, surfing the web.

The week at work was a bit stressful. My normal frantic pace was interrupted by a customer problem which included a larger-than-normal quotient of managers breathing down my neck. I was really looking forward to a weekend full of stress relief... as opposed to sickness.

Day 108 - Saturday, June 17
A scorcher. Out of nowhere, it was sunny and 85 degrees. Today was the first day I really got to see what the legs in Swindon look like: very very white. I did what I always default to on nice days... went inline skating. Discovered Swindon's Town Gardens.. which is less than a mile from my flat. Small, but relaxing and full of flowers. A tranquil escape if nothing else.

Tonight is the England vs. Germany game, and as I sit here listening to Barry White in my flat, most of Swindon is packed into pubs, faces painted, flags draped over their backs, making a lot of noise. I expect some sort of rioting tonight, regardless of whether we win or lose.

Day 111 - Tuesday, June 20
Ok, so we beat Germany, and I missed the madness afterwards. So tonight, we went down to the Firkin to watch the England vs. Romania game. The pub was packed, and the crowd was the most un-American I'd ever seen. When we scored to take the lead shortly before halftime, just about every one in the room emptied their pints of lager over everyone else. I was spared. Sadly, we lost on a penalty kick, and the once manic crowd stumbled home quietly.

Day 112 - Wednesday, June 21
I'd just like to take a moment to call my company stupid. I'm back to Chicago this weekend, and my company decided to wait until the very last moment to buy my tickets, even though we had a month notice. The tab: $3700 for a round-trip coach ticket. Compare this to the $3000 business class ticket that got me here, and you've got to wonder.

Day 114 - Friday, June 23
This was interesting. My work group here in Swindon had a group outing as a sort of reward for a job well done in the past year. It was a trip down the Thames, buffet lunch, jazz band, and all you can drink. I understand precisely why it was only a four-hour trip: since about 3 1/2 hours into the journey, most of my co-workers we having serious problems walking and talking at the same time. Only one person wound up at the hospital with a broken nose, which I suppose is a pretty good ratio.

A few hours after the boat trip ended, I was on a plane to Chicago, sobering up, suffering from a cold, but glad to be going home.

Day 115 - Saturday, June 24
Got up at 7am and enjoyed a waking up at my favorite coffee shop with the Chicago Tribune. It would not have meant so much if Swindon just had one tolerable outdoor cafe.

By mid-afternoon, my hair was a fantastic red. Got to keep my-workers on edge back in the U.K.

Day 116 - Sunday, June 25
Big party day. By 11am there were a small army of people at the house I was staying at. By 1pm, most of them were quite drunk, and very full of the fantastic food laid about the party spread. Saw many of my friends whom I hadn't seen in months, and the thought of not returning to Swindon on Wednesday did pass my mind.

Day 117 - Monday, June 26
I'm 27 today.

Went in to work in Chicago to see if anything had changed in the past few months.

In the evening, we had a nice dinner out in Andersenville. Afterward, we stopped by a friends house for a bit. It wasn't long until BLAM!, BLAM!, and I had heard my first gunshots since moving to Chicago. Apparently the nutcase Chicago Cop two doors down decided the blow away a sickly looking dog in the side yard, without warning. Before we knew that, Kevin peered out the back door and declareed: "There'a guy with a .44 in the back yard!". I have to admit I was staying away from the windows at that point. Not sure who cleaned up the dog guts.

Day 118 - Tuesday, June 27
The best part of the trip: went to the lakefront, sat in the grass, and read for a few hours. This would be one of the things I miss about Chicago the most. I later found myself downtown with a sunburn.

Day 119 - Wednesday, June 28
Back to London. Another Jim Carrey movie on the plane, another American Airlines amenity kit. The flight had the ultimate form of advertisement: Bose noise-cancelling headphones. I just have to say these babies are amazing. Remember all that noise on the plane? Put these headphones on, turn them on (don't bother plugging them into anything), and suddenly: complete silence. The computer cancels out all the ambient noise. Turn on a movie, and you're in heaven. You, and the 5 year old kicking your chair behind you.

Day 133 - Wednesday, July 12
Heard a really good weather stat on the news today: We've averaged 2.44 hours/day of sunshine so far this July. That has broken a record set in the 1940's of slightly over 3 hours/day of sunshine. I believe it. I've never been in a cold July night until now.

It's occurred to me that I'm well into the summer (of sorts) and have done very little but go back to Chicago. So, it's time to start having some fun. I'm going to find a good hotel in London and start doing a few more weekends there.

Day 136 - Saturday, July 15
Had a good weekend in London. Since I'm tiring of day trips, I got a hotel in the West End. Met an American who was travelling all about Europe. His stroies made me quite jealous. There really isn't much of a comparison between being here and working and being here strictly to travel and have fun. I still feel rather exhausted most weekends, which isn't a problem when you're truly on holiday.

Day 137 - Sunday, July 16
Got up about 9am and headed out for a trek about London. My hotel was near Tottenham Court Road. I covered a good bit of ground during the day, ending up at Hammersmith Station. During the time, I passed though St. James, Green, and Hyde parks, as well as a tourist-laden Buckingham Palace. I photographed the tourists, not the palace.
All the American tourists

Day 140 - Wednesday, July 19
Sitting at home this evening watching the Queen Mother's 100th Birthday Parade. It's the few moments like this that I know I'm in a foreign country. So much tradition is lost on Americans. I don't dislike the royal family.

Day 143 - Saturday, July 29
A nice change of pace as I drove with some friends south to the New Forest, about 2 hours South of Swindon. It was quite impressive to suddenly find myself in a place completely unlike Wiltshire. In Chicago, you can drive for miles and miles, and it still looks like Illinois: unimpressive. You know something's a bit odd when the main road you're travelling is blocked by a small herd of wild horses. Beyond that, we did some hiking in the Forest; and forgot, for a time, where home was.
Wild horses in the New Forest
A little hiking

Day 150 - Saturday, July 29
One full day.

Tony from work is blowing out of Swindon a bit early. I don't blame him. Since he had the big yard, he threw a BBQ, and I had my first real meal in months.

At 6pm I bolted up to Dudley 90 miles North for JB's 30th B-Day bash at Dudley Castle. This was an outdoor music festival in the courtyard grounds of a castle! Miles Hunt was just taking the stage during my nicely timed arrival. He was splendid as usual, but tonight, I was here for the one-time-only reunion of Ned's Atomic Dustbin. I had spent so many evenings at college listening to Ned's, and I had never seen them live. They broke up abruptly in 1995, but never played a final show in the U.K. This was it. It was great to be part of it.
Miles Hunt on stage
The courtyard at Dudley Castle

Day 151 - Saturday, July 30
Wandered around the Birmingham City Centre. Not bad. Did a bit of shopping. Back in Swindon I had a skate around town. Returning exhausted, I slept 13 hours.

Day 155 - Wednesday, August 2
Tony's last day at work. By Noon just about everyone I work with was at a local pub. Apart from a very short return to work, it was an all-day event.

Day 157 - Friday, August 4
Clubbing in London.

Day 159 - Sunday, August 6
I thought BBC2 was supposed to be the culture channel? Then why am I watching a Beavis and Butthead movie right now?

Day 166 - Saturday, August 12
The first week of holiday begins today. Today was a bit of a nothing day. Since my mother arrives from Chicago tomorrow morning early, I spent most of the day cleaning up and getting to bed early.

Day 167 - Sunday, August 13
At Heathrow at 8:30am, where I met my mother from her Chicago flight. Begin uncontrolled spending spree.

In the afternoon we had a drive around Wiltshire, including Avebury, Bath, and surrounding villages. The weather refused to cooperate, but that was not unusual or overly annoying. Got pulled over by the cops in Bath because I drove down a bus lane, which I assume was put there just to confuse tourists. Another vote for my desire to stop driving. Dinner at The Three Crowns was once again the best meal in the Southwest of England. Generally, we have nothing but poor restaurants in and around Swindon, but The Three Crowns is in a class of its own. If anyone else ever comes and visits me (unlikely), I'll be sure to take them there.
Big Rocks at Avebury

Day 168 - Monday, August 14
Off to London in the early afternoon. Staying at the Inter-Continential at Hyde Park corner. Woah. I guess I was sick of staying at dumps all the time, and I must admit, this was a definite 180. Stuffy doormen, big TV, VCR, fax machine, loads of food, ultra-clean everything, and one of those self-defogging bathroom windows.

The tour of London was intended to minimize foot pain, so we did one of things I though I'd never do in London: took a bus tour. Oddly enough, it was very enjoyable. The weather was perfect and I learned a lot about the city, depite my many previous visits. The bus took us places I'd never think to visit on my own, and we didn't have to get plowed over by Oxford Street mobs.

Day 169 - Tuesday, August 15
Started off the day by standing in a 2 hour line in front of the Russian Embassy in order to get a visa for my upcoming trip to Moscow. I had to pick the day in which they were closed the following, which meant longer than average waiting.

From the Embassy, I met my mother at Harrods, where she had resisted the urge to buy anything. From there, we did the 'One Amazing Day' bit at the Dome. I must say that the most impressive part of the trip to the Millenium Dome is the new Jubilee Line. It's not that the Dome itself isn't too impressive, it's just that the new tube is more impressive.
Outside the Dome
Inside the Dome
The N. Greenwich Tube Station

The Dome was 'OK'. I get creeped with I'm surrounded by thousands of kids, so I suppose I wasn't open to the entire experience, but I can see why it is losing money, since the $30 of sushi we had inside for lunch was more filling than the $30 price of admission. I must admit, I did miss the Millenium Show, which I'd been told was the best part of the day.

The end of the day displayed a bit of stupidity on my part. I *thought* I had booked London Eye tickets for this day, but I was wrong: I had booked them for Monday. So, there was no trip on the Eye. We ended the day back on the bus tour.

Day 170 - Wednesday, August 16
A bit more tourism this morning with a walk around St James and Green Parks. Stumbled across Buckingham Palace during changing of the guard, again with amazement at the number of people who would turn up for such a dull event. Despite always being amused with the royals as the 'proper British' stereotype, I'm more and more sick of their wealth, considering the poverty problem Britiain is dealing with.
Queens Goose

At 3pm we were at Kings Cross station, where we boarded an express train to Edinburgh, Scotland. It was a very nice trip on what is regarded the best train line in the U.K. The train was not as nice as the trains in Switzerland, but well above any others in England. The train was delayed for 1 hour in Newcastle due to a lightning strike, but it wasn't too much of a bother. My Mother spent the time attempting to work through the accents of the people sitting across from us, and I busied myself with a Russian language book.

The the time we arrived in Edinburgh, the day was over, and after checking into a B&B we paid a visit to a Chinese restaurant and retired.

Day 171 - Thursday, August 17
Touring Edinburgh. Since the bus tour worked rather well in London, we did the same here in Edinburgh. The open top bus was a bit less pleasant with the cold Scottish wind, but it did make for an excellent view of the city. The weather continued to cooperate, despite my assurances to my mother that it was usually grey and wet.
Edinburgh Castle

Edinburgh bills itself as a festival city, and little did I know how serious they were about being top in their class. When we stopped to grab some festival programmes, I was amazed to see literally hundreds of plays and concerts each night in this small place. I tried to find something my Mother and I would enjoy. It wasn't easy, until I spotted the old Saturday night favorite: "Too Much Light Makes The Baby Go Blind", by the Neo-Futurists. No, this wasn't a hallucination, I was in Scotland, and so were the Neo-Futurists. I'd seen the show 4 or 5 times in Chicago, so the choice was easy, and we were there. It was an interesting show, considering it was at 6:30pm instead of the usual midnight, and the venue was a half-full mixed crowd, instead of a packed house full of Chicago's oddest creations. A good show, though lacking the audience energy you'd find in Chicago.

Finished the evening back at the B&B eating sandwiches from Sainsbury.

Day 172 - Friday, August 18
A day of return travel, leaving Edinburgh at 9:30am, and getting back to Swindon about 4pm.
Newcastle by Train
The North Sea

Day 173 - Saturday, August 19
Headed off to Heathrow to send Mom home. I know she didn't want to go, and I don't blame her: it will be in the low-90's when she gets home. I can't deal with weather like that; I'll take cold rain any day.

Day 180 - Saturday, August 26
The Reading Festival (of mud)! For years and years I have been watching the British music festivals take place. I even have a program of the Reading Festival years ago when The Wonder Stuff headlined. Finally I was here, in a field of mud with tens of thousands of drinking of drunk Brits. I came to see only one band: The Wannadies. In order to kill off several afternoon hours, I found myself mainly in the comedy tent, which, apart from keeping the rain off, was very entertaining. At 9pm, I FINALLY saw The Wannadies, one of my all time top 3 bands. I've you've been reading from the start, you'll know that their first U.K. tour was sold out before I could book, and the second tour was cancelled, so this was the ending of a cruel wait.

The Wannadies were excellent, the crowd was manic, and the 50-minute set was much too short. They had better tour again before my year is up.

Day 182 - Monday, August 28
Bank Holiday Monday, so instead of work I *attempted* to go hiking with my friend Brian. Unfortunately, by the time we arrived at a forest park in the Cotswolds, it was pouring rain. We tried to pretend like we could hike in this weather, but it was impossible, so we returned to Swindon and watched the X-Men. Naturally the weather cleared as soon as arrived at the cinema.

Day 187 - Saturday, September 2
I pass the halfway point this week. It hardly seems like I have been here for half a year, but 'tis true. The only depressing aspect of the situation is the fading summer. I do intent to become a bit depressed once the days are about 6 hours long. Luckily, some of my best travels are yet to come. I'm 7 days away from Russia, which should prove the most interesting, and hopefully enjoyable of all trips.

This week was about as bland as they come, sitting at my desk for the bulk of it. Monotonous, but it needed to be done.

Day 188 - Sunday, September 3
I'm just about finished with "Down Under", by Bill Bryson. If anything this book is making me far more impatient that ever to visit Australia. After a pub lunch I found myself lying under the Sun in a park in Swindon. Within no time, a local homeless man had wandered up and offered my a swig of the bottle of dark rum he swiped from Sainsbury's (not an assumption, he told me). I declined, but was able to hear his life story before be wandered off. A nice guy who needs to get off the sauce. Unable to find some peace, I ended up back at my flat where I did manage to finish my book, which I recommend to anyone.

Day 194 - Saturday, September 9
This was a day I had been looking forward to for a long long time. It's 10am, and I'm standing in front of the Aeroflot checkin desk at Heathrow. In my hand is my Passport, a Russian visa, and a ticket to Moscow. A few minutes later I find myself salivating in front of an Ilyushin Il-86.

After growing up with a father in the airlines, I've done a good deal of travelling. I've developed quite a fondness for airliners since then. From the concept of flying to the technology that makes them 'go', I've always been fascinated by them. I've done a pretty good job getting a ride on just about every Western airliner, but this was going something beyond different. The Ilyushin Il-86 is Russia's first widebody airliner, which began production in the late 70's. It has more seats than the 777; and for all you cynics, not a one has ever gone down.
Ilyushin IL-86
Inside the big plane

On board was a bit like walking into the past. The plane was unusually large. The interior cabin was larger than any plane I had ever been on, having a very tall cabin with a horizontal ceiling design. It was a bit like the interior of a L-1011, only more spacious. The seats were a bit old, and built with an obvious Soviet-style functionality with little amenity. The plane had multiple sets of stairs in the middle of the cabin, leading to multiple downstairs exits, which allows the jet to be used in airports without jetway technology: pretty cool.

We took off, and after a very pleasant 3 hours, I landed in Moscow. It was one of those unbelievable moments you can only have once. At Moscow airport you know you are in a foreign land: 90% of the airliners were made by Ilyushin, Tupelov, or Antonov. Planes I had only seen before in photos were now lined up along the ramps and terminals of the airport, most in the colours of Aeroflot, or other airlines I had never seen before.

Once in the airport, I met my Russian friends and headed into the city on a bus. Practically the first thing you see past the airport is a common sight: Ikea. The Moscow Ikea is the second-largest in the world, shadowed only by the Chicago Ikea, which I have been a frequent visitor of. At a time when foreign companies fled from Russia after the 1998 economic crash, Ikea moved in, and is doing amazingly well considering there was not an empty space in the parking lot.

At my friend's flat I was introduced to a hyper kitten and a great deal of hospitality. Dinner was twice a much as I could eat, and then they made me eat more. After dinner, we hit a Moscow club until the wee morning hours. It was a brilliant time.

My Lonely Planet guidebook has a wise recommendation. It was that for every two drinks your Russian counterparts have, you should drink only one. I would have been better off if I had read this part of the book before my evening out. The course of the evening went something like this: 2 glasses of champange, 3 shots of vodka, 1 16oz can of gin and tonic, and 3 Baltika beers. That's not the tally for the three of us, that would be the tally for me. The end of the evening found me spending a lot of personal time with a funny looking Russian toilet.

Day 195 - Sunday, September 10
We all woke up about 3pm. You can't blame us. Today was the best day of the trip weather-wise: sunny and warm. As we approached Red Square we crossed the Moscow River and found ourselves in one of the most postcard-perfect scenes in the world: St. Basil's Cathedral. We wandered around Red Square, over to Pushkin Square, and through numerous parks and squares, most of which I can't recall. In the late evening we journeyed to a World War II memorial park before heading home.
St. Basils Cathedral
A skate ramp just outside of Red Square

Day 196 - Monday, September 11
The Moscow metro is amazing. Construction of it began in the 1930's under Stalin, with workers enduring brutal conditions for years on end. What these people created is without a doubt the best metro system in the world. The downtown stations have so much artwork they could easily be mistaken for museums. Most of the stations have a military or Soviet theme, but are just so impressive you don't bother to care. The trains run every two minutes on the average, and the system carries more people than London and New York combined.

In contrast, a train station in downtown Chicago could easily be mistaken for a section of the city sewer system. I realise this isn't a fair comparison: the Chicago subway wasn't built by Soviets, and is run by a private company. However, I think a city's public transit system is a symbol of the city, and Chicago has a good way to go.

Day 197 - Tuesday, September 12
After another late night, we barely managed to make it to the Kremlin before it closed at 5pm. We toured the different cathedrals of the site, taking in several thousand religous icons, a few 600 year old coffins, and Putin, or one of his cohorts speeding by in a well-protected motorcade. From the Kremlin, we wandered through some of Moscow's biggest shopping malls: GUM, TSUM, and Children's World.
Vlad and Sergey in Red Square, next to the GUM department store
Cathedrals at the Kremlin

From there we retired to a cafe, and I made an observations: there is nowhere on this planet where you can escape Britney Spears.

Day 198 - Wenesday, September 13
Today we took in the All-Russia Exhibition grounds. Once a place to display the wonders of Soviet accomplishment, it is now one of Moscow's largest markets, with everything from garden supplies to electronics equipment. We had lunch in a cafe overlooking a Tupelov TU-154 jetliner which stood between two of the exhibition buildings.
The All-Russia Exhibition Grounds
Tupelov Tu-154 Jet at on the Exhibition grounds

From the exhibition ground, we walked part the Botanical Gardens and over to the Ostankino Tower. Yes, it burned. However, one could not see any indication of the fire by looking at the tower, but the observation tower was now closed to visitors.

Shortly after midnight, we boarded a train for St. Petersburg. I've always enjoyed travelling by train, and this was more than a pleasant suprise. We travelled third class, and found ourselves in a new train car, with compartments for 6 people each. I had no problem sleeping during the 8.5 hour trip, and the packed compartent was eerily, respectfully silent.

Day 199 - Thursday, September 14
Here's another thing I really enjoyed about the train trip: the morning tea. I paid $400 for my airline ticket to Moscow, and received tea in a plastic cup. On the train, you get a glass in a metal holder. Some small things like this make all the difference in the world. Did I mention the round-trip ticket from Moscow to St. Petersburg cost about $8?

After breakfast we wandered into the centre of St. Petersburg and boarded a hydrofoil that wisked us out onto the Neva River, and into the Gulf of Finland. In about 30 minutes we arrived at Peterhof, a royal palace to the Southwest of the city. We spent the afternoon walking the palace grounds, then headed back to St. Petersburg.

That night we wandered aimlessly for a while before finding ourselves in a fantastic club, where we easily let 8 hours of our lives slip by.

That evening, we encountered another aspect of St. Petersburg that could have been avoided if I had read my guidebook. From roughly 3am-5am each morning, the drawbridges over the Neva River rise to let the countless ships out of the port of St. Petersburg. We didn't know this, and found ourselves sitting by the river for over an hour in a 40 degree rain until the drawspans lowered. It was almost amusing: but we were exhausted, and slightly annoyed at having chose a hotel just on the other side of the river.

Day 200 - Friday, September 15
Today we visited the Hermitage Museum, which is often compared to the Louvre as one of the two best museums in the world. And it was. Located partially in the Czar's Winter Plaace, it is a history museum and an art museum. From Monet to Picasso to little stone carvings from the earliest man, we walked until our feet just couldn't go anymore. In the entire day, I think we saw about 40% of the museum.

Late in the evening, we were back in a train for Moscow. Nikita, by Elton John, was playing on the train's radio as we waited to depart. It was an interesting touch.

Day 201 - Saturday, September 16
A lazy day, as intended. Getting back to Moscow shortly after 6am, we all agreed that a few more hours of sleep couldn't hurt, and a few hours quickly became 8. About all we accomplished in the day was a trip to the biggest CD fair I have ever seen. On the Northwest side of town, hundreds of sellers set up booths each weekend, selling CDs, CD-ROMs, an MP3 discs at semi-legal prices. I bought a couple of Russian dance mix CDs before returning to the flat for a final night of drinking.

Day 202 - Sunday, September 17
Got to sleep at 5am, woke up at 7am. You figure it out. At the airport, I waved goodbye to my friends, breezed through customs beside three very rude Australians, and hopped on an Aeroflot 777 for my uneventful trip back to London.

At Heathrow, I made the unfortunate discovery that I left my camera in Russia. It wasn't a big deal.. just a one-time-use camera. I'd have my friends in Moscow develop the film and send me the photos.

The week I was absent from Great Britain, the country had been having some fun with fuel protests. Only a few days before, over 90% of the petrol stations in the country were dry. Luckily, things were getting back to normal, and there was actually a coach there to take me home.

As I sat on the bus, things started to become a bit clearer for me. How could I come to leave my camera in Moscow? I had left it right beside my money, ATM card, and house keys. My tired mood migrated to something entirely different when I carefully emptied my backpack to realise what I had done. Yes, at 5am I was a bit drunk, and in the 7am madness, we bolted out the front door without my taking some of the things I needed most.

After arriving in Swindon, I had to walk 30 minutes home from the coach station, as I hadn't a penny to my name. The backup plan was to call a friend from work to lend me money, and stay in a hotel until I could find a way into my apartment. However, by a miracle, my neighbor was home. By another micacle he had a key to my flat, something I had entirely not expected. It turned out, my only loss will be the $60 it will cost me to DHL my keys and camera back from Moscow. An amusing cost, since after all, I had only spend about $100 during the entire week.

Day 204 - Tuesday, September 19
It's wet again. Very very wet. Did I mention cold? As summer fades away, I wonder how my stamina will hold up here. I'm used to spectacular snow in the winter, not grey rain. Hopefully the indoor activities will more than compensate.

Day 212 - Wednesday, September 27
On a training course in London. It is wonderful to be in London during the week. During the week, it has the energy of a big city, more so than the tourist-laden weekend scene. We dined at Belgo, which for years has been one of my favorite restaurants. Mussels and the finest beer selection I have ever seen.

Day 215 - Saturday, September 30
When you live in a foreign country and are homesick, the next best thing to going home is having your friends show up on your doorstep. Unfortunately, none of my friends plan to make good on their promises to visit me in England. Luckily, I've managed a plan to meet up with my ex-roomate Nicole during her three week tour of Ireland.

I barely made it to Bristol Airport in time for my flight, but found it refreshing to have a parking space no more than 300 feet from the terminal entrance. This airport is smaller than the office I work in, and it was a real pleasure. After so many adventures at Heathrow it was refreshing to coast through check-in, customs, and boarding in less than 10 minutes.

Another thing I love about Europe is the airlines. On a 50-minute turboprop flight from Bristol to Dublin they manage to feed you. In the U.S., expect food only on flights longer than two hours, and don't bother eating it unless you're travelling first class.

The city centre of Dublin is small but charming. I love the rivers which flow through a majority of European cities. They give the cities a charm and character you just don't find in poorly planned American cities like Dallas. I don't think I'd find myself living anywhere far from a body of water. I need to be able cast my eyes across something and daydream.

They don't give proper tours of the Guiness Brewery in Dublin. It was a bit disappointing to find ourselves at the 'Guiness Hop Store' instead. It was equally disappointing to learn that Guiness is owned by the same company who owns Burger King. The Hop Store is a dull museum (unless you're fanatic about Guiness adverts), which we flew through to get to the sampling. "They" say that the Guiness is much different in Ireland, and I agree. The museum tour did teach me one thing, the Guiness content in Ireland sets itself apart in two ways: Irish water and Irish hops. Apparently that is enough. The brew tasted much cleaner, with very little of the aftertaste found in foreign Guiness.

We finished the evening at Belgo Dublin. I can't get enough of that place, in any city.

Day 216 - Sunday, October 1
Without a decent plan, we found ourselves wandering aimlessly for the majority of the morning. In the early afternoon we took the 'DART' train about 10 miles South to a small suburb of Dublin, were it proceeded to rain on us all afternoon. We gave up and sat in a pub watching the other locals inhale Guiness.

Upon returning to the city centre, we saw it best to mimic the other tourists and drink loads of Guiness. We found ourselves in a pub with American football in one room and Irish dancing in the other. Not long after midnight, we found ourselves in a club with a suprisingly good dj, and, you guessed it, more black, frothy liquid.

Day 220 - Thursday, October 5
It's funny how it can be so exciting to look forward to something in life. Can you imagine how boring it would be to have absolutely nothing in the future to plan for? Luckily, my life continues to have milestones like today: home leave! As if living in England were some sort of prison sentence, I get 'let off' for good behaviour for 4 days every three months. Unlike the moments of desparation when I book my own tickets home, this one is completely paid for. My wasteful company even booked a private car for 60 mile trip to Heathrow. I promptly cancelled this reservation, since I could not stand the thought of throwing another car on the road when 3 or 4 trains per hours make the same journey in less time.

Today's trip was a bit unusual though. It was the 1 year anniversary of the Paddington rail disaster, the U.K.'s work rail disaster in over a decade. It took place on the same line I travel nearly every week, and this morning there would be a moment of silence on at Paddington Station at 8:11am, the time two high speed trains collided head on 6 minutes outside of the station.

I had realised only the night before that I would be at the station at the same time. My train from Swindon arrived shortly before 8am, and the board showed the 8:05 train cancelled, in memory. Unfortunately, my train the Heathrow left a few minutes early today, at 8:07, to avoid any traffic in the station at 8:11. This made it even more surreal, since I would have passed the location of the disaster only 2 minutes, less one year, before it happened. It is interesting how many lives I cross as I go about living.

Within 2 hours, I was in the air, typing this to the tune of Russian dance tunes, looking forward to a trip to the dentist as soon as I land in Chicago.

Day 223 - Sunday, October 8
I'm am cleaning house today when I get a whiff of what we all instantly recognise as that 'burning plastic' smell. Apparently my monitor was telling me it was dying, very rapidly dying. It was resting comfortably on the curbside in front of my house shortly thereafter.

Day 240 - Wednesday, October 25
I've now purchased a new monitor. I'm not very motivated to write though. What would I say anyway? It's raining? It's dark at 4:30?

Day 251 - Sunday, November 5
Notice the trend here? I'm only finding time to express myself here on Sundays. This isn't entirely my fault, since my flat has line noise so intolerable that it's nearly impossible to make a connection to my ISP most nights. On the other hand, a bit more work than I'd like, as well as a decent social life have given me reasons to avoid the Internet more often: something I'd recommend to anyone.

Most of this country is underwater at the moment. Various towns in the Midlands and the North are completely submerged. All the global warming experts are screaming, but fail to notice that it has all happened before, only with a few tens of millions fewer people in the country. Enter a few million homes built on flood plains, and see what happens?

I hate American politics. The world hates American politics. This entire election is little more than entertainment and employment for journalists. One might think that being in a different country might exclude me from being exposed to all this U.S. election CRAP, but no, we're as deep in it as anyone else. We are the 51st State remember?

Day 258 - Sunday, November 12
I forced myself out of this house this afternoon, and up to the Cotswolds to find a pub for lunch. We ended up in Lechlade, on the Thames River, which is about 10-15 miles north of Swindon. The Thames River is feeling a bit, erm, full this week. Actually, most of the rivers in England are bursting their banks. Call it Global Warming (which I don't), or call it the worst floods this country has seen in 50 years. Lechlade isn't hit too bad, just some flooding in the surrounding farmland. Other towns in England are completely underwater.

Moisture aside, we found a nice pub with dogs lying on the floor (a prerequisite for English pubs), and had a nice Sunday lunch.

Day 263 - Friday, November 17
For the second time in as many weeks, I'm sick. I've said before this is a country of germs, and I'm sticking to that. Since my job is to speak, and since I can't speak at the moment, I walked into work this morning, grabbed my laptop, and walked out. I did stop by my supervisor's desk to tell him I couldn't stay (in my best raspy Selma Bouvier). From home, I managed to actually get some work done, sleep most of the day, and watch several girls break up with their cheating boyfriends on Rikki Lake. How nice.
The Swollen Thames at Lechlade

Day 269 - Thursday, November 23
Thanksgiving Day in the U.S.A. Typically this means eat until you feel pain and then go watch football. In Swindon, the options were limited. Fortunately, the owner of the local mexican restaurant is American, and is hosting a Thanksgiving meal. Little did I know it would be one of the single best meals I've ever eaten. Downstairs, as the locals filled themselves full of burritos, we ate several turkeys, a ham, a just about every side dish known to man. Tony really took pride in the work, and I must say, it's been a long time since a meal has made me smile quite so much.
Getting fat at Thanksgiving Dinner
My co-worker has an eating problem

Day 271 - Saturday, November 25
After getting an eye exam this afternoon, I did something I never thought I'd do again: I bought the new album by The Wonder Stuff. Well, it's not entirely new, more of a compilation of rarities and B-sides. However, there is one new song, which makes the £15 price a bargain. Some addictions never die.

Day 277 - Friday, December 1
Tonight was the company Christmas party. In Chicago, we did away with Christmas parties years ago. You see, non-Christians in the U.S. are horrified and offended when a company throws its employees a party during the month of December. In England, there is a bit more common sense. Our party was in a 16th century barn in the Cotswolds. Despite the cheesy custumes worn by the staff, it was a thoroughly good time. It's always nice to see your coworkers get drunk and act out of character.
Small bird-like food thing.

Day 284 - Friday, December 8
It's odd how small things can affect you. Doing the same thing day in and day out at work really tends to dull life. Shortly before 4:30, I followed my manager out the door to supposedly see an Iridium Flare. Ah, to be a geek. So we went outside, looked up, and for 5 seconds, there was a flash of light brighter than any star in the sky. For some reason, it just made my day.

Day 285 - Saturday, December 9
I'm about to re-live my youth. Tonight I will be attending the first of four reunion concerts of The Wonder Stuff, undoubtedly my favorite band. This month, they are getting back together in an effort to fatten their wallets. I can't blame them.

Day 292 - Saturday, December 16
The final Wonder Stuff show ended shortly before 10pm, and I felt 18 again. The opportunity to attend four concerts by my favorite group allowed me the freedom experience the group from different perspectives. One night, I kept to the back wall, ignoring the crowd and enjoying the music. Tonight, I'm in the middle of a mass of people, feeling the music. The music was flawless, and it didn't take too long to recall why The Wonder Stuff will always be my favorite group.
The Wonder Stuff, Live at the Forum, London.

Day 300 - Sunday, December 24
Home for the holidays, Chicago that is. Having spent the past few months in a cool mist, I was pleased to discover what many other would find horrid: two feet of snow. I forgot how much I liked it. I spent most of the day wandering around, loving it. I love how the snow muffles the sounds of everything. The El trains glide instead of rattle. The snow reflects the city light into the sky making the view from an airplace utterly heavenly. Best yet, I don't have to drive in it anymore.
The slowly freezing Lake Michigan.

Day 304 - Wednesday, December 28
I'm walking around my once hometown of Sarasota, Florida. It's odd how different things appear when you're somewhere as a visitor. Last week in Chicago I spent at least an hour walking along the lakefront, just enjoying the view. Living in Chicago, I didn't take time like that nearly often enough.

Florida has always been a bit of a nut farm in my opinion. Walking around the city saw me feeling things I'd never felt before. There are probably more sport-utility vehicles in Sarasota than any other city on Earth. SUVs were cool to me way back when, but now I can't see anything in them but a waste of money. There are no snow drifts to hurdle in Sarasota, and most of these people aren't transporting any armies, so why spend so much on an inefficient vehicle? Three years ago I wanted nothing more than a new Volkswagen Passat. Today I don't want a car. There's no argument that Chicago has changed me.

Day 307 - Sunday, December 31
There are some things about living in small town England I like. For one, people don't try to rip you off quite like they do in big cities like Chicago. It's New Year's Eve, so plan on spending at least $100 to get in anywhere in Chicago tonight, regardless of how much a dive it is. Consequently, I've found myself at a very nice dinner party tonight. The conversation was so good, it wasn't until 12:10 until we noticed it was 2001.

Day 320 - Saturday, January 13
I did a really good one today. Having been conned into working on a Saturday, I convinced myself that I needed get some housework done before setting off. Through the living room with my dust rag, I eventually made it to the TV. Once the TV was cleaned, I turned toward the kitchen. It was then I heard the crash. I turn to see the 27" inch TV, fallen off it's pedestal, onto the ground, face down, looking a bit smashed. I sort of stood there for a moment, hoping that if I waited long enough it might pick itself back up and fix its injuries. Afraid not.

This TV isn't even mine, it's owned by my landlord. I have to buy another, only to leave it here when I move to Chicago in 6 weeks. To think, I'm not even planning on buying a TV at all when I get back to Chicago, and now this.

Day 329 - Monday, January 22
The other American expats warned me that the last 5 or 6 weeks would be trying. You get to that point when you've already made your living arrangements back home, and you're just counting the days. There isn't much point in taking on new friendships, since how rewarding can a 5 week friendship possibly be? I sit in my flat looking at someone else's furniture and bad taste, and think of what it will be like to finally have control over my decor again. I visit the American Airlines website on a daily basis just to see how many people are booked into my flight home (91 in Coach, 8 Business, 1 First).

I want to have a sub at Costello's. I need sushi. I am ready for the Metra to blast me with a wall of blown snow as it slides into the station.

I love England, but I've found that no matter how long I stay here, I won't be able to take part in a conversation with someone new without having to state my position about something 'American'.

I do have a bit more planned during my stay here, since without a TV, I'd go crazy.

Day 334 - Saturday, January 27
In my sudden hurry to see more of England before I depart, I've decided to spend the weekend on the South Coast, beginning with Brighton. Brighton is due south of London, and frequently thought of as the city Londoners go to on the weekends. It also appear to be where the homeless go for the winter. Unfortunate characteristics aside, Brighton is like a small London, with sort of a beatnik quality to it. There are shopping streets filled with fantastic shops which would be far to expensive to run in larger cities. Tattoo parlors, goth clothing stores, and coffee shops which aren't run by heartless corporations, to name a few.

As soon as I arrived at the waterfront in Brighton, I immediately regretted not bringing my skates. Here was miles and miles of flat pavement, city on one side, water on another. It would have been a fantastic journey on wheels. The beach is about as unusual as I could have imagined it. For miles and miles there is nothing but rocks, from pebble sized to golf ball sized, and not a grain of sand. One of the more interesting sights on this beach was the 10 or so brave men swimming in the 45-50 degree water.
Swimming in Brighton's Icy Waters.

Slightly to the East of Brighton the ground suddenly rises, and the coastline transforms into the white chalk cliffs England is so famous for. Walking on top of the cliffs I grabbed a piece of the rock and wrote a line on my coat more easily that I would have with chalkboard chalk. Very cool.
Chalk Cliffs.

West of Brighton, I ventured along to coast to Southampton, past the world headquarters of The Body Shop, and into the New Forest National Park, which I had already seen several months earlier.

Day 338 - Wednesday, January 31st
The shipping company came to 'size-up' my goods today. An overly polite representative of the shipping company informed me of all the absurd customs regulations and shit I have to fill out to get my goods back to the U.S.A. It is moments like this that I do not like to be an American. I can say without hesitation that I have to fill out about 5 times as much paperwork for the U.S. Government than I did for the U.K. government. I even need to give the shipping company power of attorney. When I moved to the U.S., I basically put my goods in crates in a moving van, and magically, 10 days later they were waiting for me in England, with almost no paperwork. Going in the opposite direction I have doubts about whether I'll ever see my stuff again.

Also today I received my new television. It looks precisely like the old one, only I am now $700 poorer.

Day 341 - Saturday, February 3rd
Another task I couldn't leave England without doing is taking a train through the Chunnel. Today to task at hand is to go to Calais, fill our car with as much cheap alcohol as possible, and return to England. The operations at the Channel Tunnel are quite impressive. You drive up, give them money, clear French Customs, and simply drive your car into a train car for the 35-minute train trip over to France.
The Chunnel Train.

Once we reached Calais we were amused to find we could still receive English radio stations. We decided to drive over to Dunkirk and wander around the town for a few hours. Easily the most impressive sight was a fish market with the most amazing selection of seafood, most of it still struggling for breath. Other obvious oddities about France is how the French love their dogs. They take them everywhere: pubs, clothing stores, grocery stores. It's a refreshing scene, since the average paranoid American would accuse you of trying to kill them with doggie germs.

But on to the task at hand. We arrived at 'Boozers' in Calais and began selecting our alcoholic booty. The toilets at the store have a sign that says 'Please use the toilets, not our floor'. This indicates pretty quickly that 'Boozers' has mostly an English clientele. We left with about $500 worth of alcohol, from $1.49 bottles of Spanish wine, to the proper French stuff, which I can't pronounce. Back at the Chunnel port, some cars were so weighed down with booze that their wheels were nearly scraping the frames. Since the introduction of the European Union, the British have been allowed to transport 'any amount for personal use' back into England. Since most alcohol is 30-40% more expensive in England due to taxation, you can imagine that most people aren't going to Calais for the French food.
Boozers.
The Booze.

Day 342 - Sunday, February 4th
Today was my last shopping day in London. At the end of the day when the train rolled out of Paddington I felt a bit sad that I didn't know when would be back. I've noticed an interesting progression of feelings throughout my expat. In case you haven't been following along the entire time, allow me to summarize:

Month 1: WOW! I'm living in England. This place Swindon is fantastic!

Month 2: OK, Swindon is a bit of a shithole, but WOW! I'm living in England.

Month 3: Why is there so much vomit on the streets? Why can't I find organic carrots? WOW! I'm living in England!

Months 4-7: I live in England, big deal. I work too hard. Instead of travelling on the weekend I lie on my couch with a bag of chips watching old movies. It's fun here, but not a huge improvement over Chicago.

Months 8-10: I live in England. I spend every evening listening to Roe and Garry on WLS in Chicago over the Internet. I miss Chicago, but hey, I'm living life. Gee, there sure is a lot of vomit on the streets. I'm doing some wonderful travelling, but I do miss my friends and life back home.
Pidgeon Food (Not for the squeamish).

Month 11: I'm sick of this place. I miss Chicago. I want to go home. No, I don't want to go out tonight, I just want to go home.

Month 12: Despite my constant complaining, I'm beginning to realise that there are things I'm dearly going to miss about this place. I do want to go home, and knowing what I'll miss is starting to tear at me. If nothing, I know I days of travelling are far from over.

During my day in London I bought all of Michael Palin's video travelogues: 'Around the World in 80 Days', 'Pole to Pole', and 'Full Circle'; all excellent videos I've been wanting to purchase for a long time.

Day 348 - Sunday, February 10th
The weekend was spent with my friends Russ and Deb in Birmingham. Less than 2 hours North of Swindon, I regret not having visited them more often during my stay.

We had a fantastic night out in no less than 5 of Birmingham's drinking venues. Some I had seen before, but we mixed in some new experiences as well. One pub was a converted bank which was nearly the grandest place I had seen in ages. It could be at the top of a list of architectural attrations, yet here in England it's just another pub. At the other end of the spectrum was Coster Mongers, a dark bar which was all about metal. Iron Maiden and Megadeth pounded out of the well-used speakers above the pool table. The crowd contained more long haired men than women, and all of them meant business (these were not pseudo-metalheads). Oddly enough, this place was the highlight of my weekend. It reminded me of that world I used to know, the one that isn't filled with crappy bleach-blonde pop music. I've been listening to almost nothing but Aerosmith ever since that night.

We ended the evening at the Birmingham Academy, a new reincarnation of an old venue The Wonder Stuff once played at. This was a mega-club, with capacity somewhere above 2000. It was a good mix of nutters, kids with too much money, and regular folk like us.

Day 351 - Tuesday, February 13th
With two weeks remaining in England, I find myself in a weeklong course on Cisco routers and switches. This is one of the main bits of gear I'll be playing with when I return to the U.S., so I'm taking in a little training beforehand. The course is held in a hotel mere steps from Heathrow, but we learn to ignore the planes in no time.

With my company tightening their belt, training budgets have been slashed recently, and I find myself in a room with only 4 other people, one of whom was auditing the course for the training deptartment. Luckily, this wasn't one of the deadfully awful internal courses; this one was taught by an outside training company. The intructor, a crusty ex-military type, was the least politically correct person I've ever met. Throughout the week we had jokes and stories of all sorts, some of which would see him fired if we he were working in America. His mix of perfect instruction and off-color entertainment made this one of the best courses I've ever been on. If only University could have been like that.

In the evenings, I was able to take in the madness of London a few final times. The evening before I returned to Swindon, I took a walk toward Heathrow, and found a nice park to watch the planes roll in from. Not far away were a group of idle Concordes, looking sad, as would a caged animal that just wants to run free.

Day 362 - Saturday, February 24th
Today began the cycle of goodbyes. I know I'm more than ready to leave England, but naturally I've made a few friends along the way. My style is just to say 'so-long' and walk away, given the probability I'll be back one day. This made it easy at times. One of my best friends informed me she was pregnant hours before I left, which made things a bit odd. There came a sober realisation that I'd be missing quite a big chunk of a good friend's life.

Day 364 - Monday, February 25th
I've realised at this point that my numbering system has gone horribly wrong. Trust me though, it's going to be 363 days, but I have better things to do than go back to locate my date numbering error.

Leaving the people at work was much easier in that I'm certain I'll return to work in Chicago only to find a pile of e-mails from them. It was customary to take the entire group out to the pub for a drink on the final day. Unfortunately, I failed to realise just about everyone would take the free pass out of work, and the lunch cost me over $120 in booze I didn't even drink.

Back at work, a constant queue of people pass my desk, all ready with the same questions. Am I ready to leave? What did I like most about England? What did I like least? Since I'm always a fan of the easily-digestable list format, I thought a bit, and came up with this:

The Best of England: TV: Goodness Gracious Me TV: So Graham Norton TV: News programs that aren't filled with shit The nuttiest people in the world Driving 85mph in the slow lane The English Countryside Shopping at Lush and Zara

The Worst of England: Vomit on the streets Expensive Everything The rain $4.00 for a gallon of gas

What I miss most about Chicago: The atmosphere of the grestest city on the planet Roe and Garry on the radio Taco Bell and sushi Cheap public transit My friends Lake Michigan Skating everywhere

Day 363, sort of - Tuesday, February 27th
Having shipped all my worldly posessions the week before, I awoke in an apartment that looked almost precisely the same as it did a year ago when I first arrived. I called a taxi, waved good-bye to the neighbors, and didn't look back. I wasn't sure how this day would feel, but it felt pretty good. As I sat in the lounge at Heathrow, I wasn't thinking much about what I was leaving, nor what was ahead. Actually, I was more fascinated by the Iran Air 747SP at the gate next to me; definitly not a plane you see very often anymore, but always one of my favorites.
747 SP - You don't see many of these anymore.

I'm in the front row of a 777, somewhere over Quebec. I've a chaotic week in front of me: no furniture, no car, new job, no life. It's unsettling to think about, but I know that once I see that Chicago skyline it won't make a bit of difference: I'll be home.
Home.